How to change a person behaviour?

My husband age is 49. At the age of 39 we got married. He is very calm going person. That means he can give everything to the others and if anybody cheat him also he is keeping quite. He cannot share his ideas or thoughts or pains or hap piess anything he cannot share with any person. As a wife I am speaking with him very calmly but no use. In so many ways I tried to know his mind. but he cannot open his mouth. If he can share his problems with any person we will solve problems. Not only that he is careless person. Even if he will loose any property also he will not bother about that. If any body asks anything if he is not having that one he can borrow from others and he will give. Just like dana karna. He is having frineds. But he cannot tell any thing to them. Even to his family members also he will not tell any thing. We have no children. I have some health problems but doctor asked me to go for ivf. But he is not interested in that. Now all the chances has gone. Because i came to menopause stage. I asked him to adopt any child but for that also he is not saying anything. Due to his behaviour he is losting so many things. I cannot say he is not a good person. He is very good person. His sisters are not married. They are elder. We have one house. theyare staying in that house. He is saying that we will give that house to them only. What about us. We will go and stay in ashram. Everybody is taking his behaviour as as advantage.and everybody is cheating him. He is a govt employee. We have lakhs of loans and borrows. He dont want me to do job. He dont want to meet any doctor. How can I know his thoughts and all.